Dele Sikuade
Lockdown is a lie. So is the end of it.
Boris shut nothing. If he announced the reopening of pubs and restaurants, and a festival to celebrate the end of lockdown, we’d ignore him
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Short Stories and Political Satire
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Dele Sikuade
- Apr 18, 2020
- 8 min
An alternative for the conspiracy theorists of the COVID-19 age
I was moved to write this post because I woke up and realised that conspiracy theorists are as much a category of people as any other....
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Dele Sikuade
- Nov 23, 2018
- 3 min
The Thursday Rant: The Minoads Awards
This week’s award goes to John Allen Chau, who thought it was his duty to preach about a magic Jewish prophet to the Sentinelese people, a p
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Dele Sikuade
- Nov 23, 2018
- 4 min
The Thursday Rant: The MINOADS Awards
This corpulent man who grows fatter daily on the sweat of the poor, is not content with people giving what they can afford. He wants to forc
20 views0 comments
Dele Sikuade
- Jun 13, 2018
- 3 min
The bastard child of democracy
Call me a sceptic but I’m willing to bet that 99% of people who voted for Brexit argued among other things that it was to ‘bring back...
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Dele Sikuade
- Jun 8, 2018
- 8 min
The Friday Rant: How to tell if you're a geek
How to tell if you or someone you know is a geek or just a nerd.
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Dele Sikuade
- Jun 5, 2018
- 5 min
The Friday Rant: Are you tired of living in the average world?
Bob has an IQ of 140. This makes him very smart but not a genius. Jane, Peter and Paul have IQs of 100, 90 and 70 respectively. The...
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Dele Sikuade
- May 28, 2018
- 5 min
Monday Rant: Donald Trump's Secret Membership Application
Dear Donald,
Thank you for your application for membership of The League of Dastardly Dictators. I regret to inform you that having conside
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Dele Sikuade
- May 27, 2018
- 5 min
Why we'll have no second coming in Africa
In an outbreak of mass lunacy the people of Malawi have been killing people accused of being blood-sucking vampires. Malawi police are...
44 views0 comments
Dele Sikuade
- May 11, 2018
- 4 min
The Friday Rant: The Olive Branch
Dear Bill, It’s been a while since we spoke and I’m sorry, I should have called or sent a text. I know you’ve been avoiding me because I...
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Dele Sikuade
- May 9, 2018
- 3 min
If only we could still see them
When I was a boy I imagined the world of the future. Nowhere in my imagination were the wars, the famine, the brutality and mindless...
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Dele Sikuade
- Mar 16, 2018
- 4 min
The Friday Rant: Modern-day generals too dumb to know there's supposed to be a point to war.
It was back in the early sixteenth century that Nicholas Machiavelli wrote The Prince. It was a guide to his employers, the Medici rulers...
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Dele Sikuade
- Feb 19, 2018
- 1 min
Men of god growing fat on the flock.
A wise friend said something to me that encapsulates the truth of so many who profit from religion. He said: 'Dele, if you believed in...
18 views0 comments
Dele Sikuade
- Jan 22, 2018
- 4 min
And the poor shall eat the rich
Here’s a confident prediction for you – sooner or later people will notice the Emperor is butt naked, has twenty trillion plus in...
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Dele Sikuade
- Dec 1, 2017
- 8 min
Friday Rant - An antidote to the royal wedding
So we have another Royal Wedding. Yaay! While I admire Harry and assume he’s made an excellent choice of bride, I now have to make space...
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Dele Sikuade
- Nov 17, 2017
- 6 min
Stop messing with my mind!
The phone rings and for one of a dozen reasons I can’t take the call. I hit the kill button (as I call it) and divert to voicemail. Five...
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Dele Sikuade
- Nov 13, 2017
- 4 min
Michael Gove speaks - the Lizard Lord returneth
Michael Gove, a man whose face looks like a deflated balloon you’d find behind the sofa six weeks after a kiddie party, went on the...
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Dele Sikuade
- Nov 3, 2017
- 6 min
It's official - Tillerson is dumber than a bag of hammers
Donald Trump’s recent assertion - that he had a higher IQ than Secretary of State Rex Tillerson - got one group of software developers...
25 views0 comments
Dele Sikuade
- Oct 7, 2017
- 5 min
May is taking bad boy Boris with her
Theresa May is too smart to sack Boris. She's taking him down with her.
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Dele Sikuade
- Oct 4, 2017
- 7 min
How to explain the N. Korean crisis to kids
Once upon a time there was a school bully called Donny. Born rich, and not bad looking, he epitomised the saying that the good Lord...
16 views0 comments
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